one word reviews of Movies and TV

Monday, April 22, 2019

A Simplistic Review: Guava Island


There's nothing wrong with VANITY projects. Big music stars have done it for decades. "Purple Rain" with Prince, "Michael Jackson's Moonwalker," "Cool as Ice" with Vanilla Ice and who could forget "Swept Away" with the indomitable Madonna. Hmmm, come to think of it...maybe there is something wrong with them.

"Guava Island" is a 55-minute music video for Donald Glover where he gets to weave in some of his newer songs into a film about putting on a festival on a island that is under the control of a guy named Red Cargo who doesn't want his works to have Sunday off.

Oh, Rihanna is also in this film.

It's fine, and the opening animation scene reminded of something out of "Coco" and of course the public infatuation will continue for Glover, for good reason of course, the dude is super talented.

Sunday, April 7, 2019

A Simplistic Review: Pet Sematary (2019)


Let it be known that 2019's "Pet Sematary" remake is a REMINDER that yes, sometimes dead is better...

No matter what I say people are going to continue to translate Stephen King's work into films, but man, has there been any one source that has the up-and-down's like King's material.

After the remake of "It" hit big back in 2017, it was open season on getting back on King's D and trying another remake; that one happened to be this year's "Sematary."

Sure, there are a couple of things that I like about this remake, but the acting is wooden and it almost feels like the filmmakers are trying to have their cake and eat it too. Is this flick high brown or low brow horror? How much can we change to make this story feel fresh, etc...

Sure, I don't expect a new generation to check out the original from 1989, considering no one wants to watch an old movie, let's just dive into a remake, but hopefully this is a lesson that not every film deserves that much coveted remake treatment.

Wednesday, April 3, 2019

(Ep. 119): The Simplistic Reviews Podcast April 2019


The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back from Spring break...clean...sober...and ready to go. One of those things is true. The boys discuss everything they missed since they’ve been gone. From James Gunn rehiring, to the etymology of the word “trump”, to that famous last line in Lethal Weapon 2. You remember that one right? We sure didn’t. Doug Funny, Oregon Trail, Jenny & Melissa McCarthy...all points of interest or disinterest on this Spring fling episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.


MUSIC
Fast Times Club By IDOL
Gold Medal By Sounds Like Sander

Monday, April 1, 2019

A Simplistic Review: Dragged Across Concrete


This April Fool's review is brought to you by Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn. I'm sure a bunch of you thought it was a joke when they starting showing up to award shows together, but "Dragged Across Concrete" is no joke, it's an actual film, and it's actually an UPWARD movement in the reestablishment of Gibson maybe making his way back into the Hollywood stream. Not mainstream, but at least dipping his toe back in the waters.

S. Craig Zahler's filmography might be short, but damn is it impressive. From horror-western fare, prison exploitation and now heist films, he's getting impressive results away from the mainstream and creating pretty kick-ass films.

Gibson and Vaughn are great, but the star of this film is Tory Kittles as the freshly releases ex-con looking to make good on taking care of his family by any means necessary and still having a moral code.

"Bone Tomahawk" and "Brawl in Cell Block 99" are great on their own, but I think "Concrete" is Zahler's best work to date and he's shaping up to be the Neo-Tarantino we all deserve.

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