They say in love that you have to love someone completely. It’s one of those rules that greeting card companies made up so many years ago. Despite my surly demeanor most of the time, I sincerely subscribe to this notion. I believe that you need to know a person inside and out to really love them. However, it’s sad when that person you feel so much affection for stars in films that just seem below them and you can tell they are sleeping-walking throughout. Anna, darling, why “Rapture-Palooza?” It’s truly an exercise in “meh-filmmaking.” It’s like when you see someone like Morgan Freeman in “Edison Force” or Tommy Lee Jones in “Man of the House.” You shake your head, not because you’re upset, but because you’re disappointed. My dear Anna, my Academy Award nominated Anna, 2013 should have been a great year for you, but instead we get “Rapture-Palooza.”
I know I sound disappointed, but I’m trying to hold it together. “Rapture” is the story of Lindsey (Kendrick) and her boyfriend Ben (John Francis Daley) who are living in post-Rapture Seattle with a dream of running a successful sandwich cart. After their cart is demolished by giant Apocalypse meteorites the couple have no choice but to put their plans on hold and try and work for The Beast/Anti-Christ (Craig Robinson). After seeing Lindsey, The Beast decides that she will be the one to bear his next child. With time running out, and their families lives on the line, Ben and Lindsey have to come up with a plan to stop The Beast.
The unfortunate part about “Rapture” is that it was overshadowed by another End of the World comedy in 2013, “This is the End,” also starring Craig Robinson. However, the bigger problem with “Rapture” is the dragging nature of the film. Daley doesn’t come off as someone who can carry a comedy, and is much better suited in ensembles like “…Waiting” and “Freaks and Geeks.” Kendrick, while charming, is merely a vessel for the film to have some sort of fan appeal, and she doesn’t really have much to do in the film besides react to Robinson’s outrageous version of the Anti-Christ.
The star of “Rapture,” however, is Robinson. Whenever he opens his mouth it’s pure solid gold, if said gold was covered in sex and cum-drenched jokes. What makes his performance work is a combination of two things. One, since Robinson is so likeable he can get away with saying some of the most offensive things you can say to a young, virginal, girl and you don’t feel bad laughing. Two, Kendrick’s reactionary performance gives Robinson room to take his dialogue to the lowest of lows, and its hilarious throughout.
Outside of Kendrick and Robinson, the rest of cast is rather dull. Rob Corddry plays a typical Rob Corddry character; he’s rude, vulgar, and at some point will yell something crazy about drugs. Ana Gasteyer doesn’t bring much to the proceedings either. The one surprise is Thomas Lennon as the undead neighbor of Lindsey who is obsessed with mowing his lawn. It reminds me of one of Lennon’s many characters from his days as a member of “The State.”
At the end of the day, or world for that matter, “Rapture” is an exercise in love and patience, for me at least. The film is rather ordinary and suffers from long droughts of exposition and not very thoughtful or funny dialogue. Only clocking in at 85 minutes, the film isn’t that long, but seems better suited as a short film you might find at a student-run film festival. Without the performances of Kendrick and Robinson, “Rapture” would have been entirely forgettable.