John Malkovich

April 6, 2018

(Ep. 102): The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: April 2018

This isn’t a joke…the boys are back on the airwaves with another edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast…or are they? You be the judge of whether you think they’re back or not. I might be telling you here that they are back, but are they truly “back.” And if they’re back, where are they back from? The Future, School, Training, To Back, In Black, Rubs, In The Habit, For The First Time, again, it’s up to you to decide…

This month, the shenanigans range to these nincompoops yelling about whether Spielberg or Scorsese did it better, and by IT they mean holding the camera and making millionaires do things on camera, to the merits of Justin actually discovering he’s North African and how we can us that to our advantage.

There is also the return of Simplistic Switcharoo where the fellas tackle the big questions of whether Nicolas Cage could be replaced by John Malkovich in Face/Off and after a long a sordid history, Matt might finally come to terms with the concept of Anne Hathaway.

All this, and of course your monthly dose of dick and fart jokes, on The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, if you SMELL…..what THE CROCK…..is cookin’!!

 

 NOTES
Anne ‘Cat’haway
ASMR Porn
Nic Cage and Peaches
Macho Madness
Diplomatic Immunity

MUSIC
Neon Love by Jeff Dale, Gavin Harrison and Tim Reilly
Hit the Jackpot by David James
80s Killed The Radio Star by Bobby Cole

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June 20, 2014

Simplistic Sneak Peek Ep. 5

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

Simplistic Sneak Peek is back and better than ever.  In this episode the boys take a look at some animated features and some 80s action stars WITH animated features.  Sinbad, The Ultimate Warrior, Dane Cook and a Holocaust amusement park all come up in this irreverent return of Simplistic Sneak Peek.  You can watch this episode’s trailers below then click video above to hear Matt, DJ and Justin’s thoughts on them in real time.

Planes: Fire & Rescue

Penguins Of Madagascar

The Expendables 3

Bonus Trailer

January 12, 2013

Holiday Hangover, Special Guest Reviewer Edition: Warm Bodies

Warm Bodies – Surprising

 *This review is being provided by guest contributor, Kayleigh Brown, aka, Kayleighkill.  Thanks for the submission Kayleigh, and we look forward to having more guest submissions.  You can find Kayleigh on YouTube through the following link.  She is also on Twitter and Tumblr.* 

I won’t lie, going into Warm Bodies, I couldn’t help but mentally notice the Twilight parallels. After all, both movies come from Summit Entertainment, it’s a love story about a girl and her monster, and there’s people trying to kill them; not to mention, one very familiar “laying in a field” scene. The similarities stop there.
Where Twilight failed, this movie picks up the pieces, and then some. It isn’t just your typical ‘girl meets monster’ flick. Yes, its central theme is based on love, but its much broader than that. It isn’t just “I want to die to be with you” love. It’s love in the form of acceptance, family, friends, and memories. It’s looking past differences and accepting someone for who they are. I’m looking too far into it; you have to watch the movie to understand that analysis.
I won’t spoil any secrets in regards to Warm Bodies, but it definitely is a paving stone for completely reinventing the zombie image. It offers not only ridiculously funny quips at times, but touching moments with some serious overtones, and sometimes even a cringe-worthy scene or two. The romantic development of the main characters is almost placed on the back-burner, as the rest of the story unfolds around it. They really took a fairly predictable plot (from the trailer) and turned it into something more. The likeability of the characters is also a huge factor as to why I enjoyed the movie so much. It helps with great actors such as Rob Corddry and John Malkovich supporting the upcoming talent that spotlight the movie. (Nicholas Hoult and Teresa Palmer)
Overall, the movie was a surprising hit, right down to the creepy antagonists of the movie, the ‘Bonies’. I wouldn’t want to run into a flesh eating skeleton in an alley anytime soon. Even the soundtrack is amazing. Bob Dylan? Guns N’ Roses? M83? I’ll take it.

*This review is based on a sneak preview that took place on January 10th, 2013.  “Warm Bodies” will be widely released on February 1st 2013.  Thank you Regal Cinemas for the FREE tickets for this event.  This movie will be revisited upon it’s actual release.*

September 24, 2012

Mulholland Falls

Mulholland Falls: Falls
(1996)

(Story from IMDB)
In 1950’s Los Angeles, a special crime squad of the LAPD investigates the murder of a young woman.
“This isn’t America, Jack. This is L.A.”

Listen, yes there are many issues with this film, but its watchable. I say Falls because it seems to make so many promises to the viewer in the beginning and then Falls as the story unveils. The story could work, but I don’t think it does here. Far fetched? Maybe. The story seems like it wants to be about a group of badass guys who kickass to get their job done in the LAPD. But the director Lee Tamahori seems not to understand where he wants to go with this. It feels like the story would last this long yet the script hinders it and therefor makes the story expire shorter then it would normally. What I mean is its two different films. One in the beginning and one at the end. I don’t know, seems like that, then again I’ve always had a issue with Lee. As a Bond fan all I must say is Die Another Day.
More on that on another day.
But
“A hundred die so that a thousand may live.” 
the cast is pretty great. I enjoy Nick Nolte’s Max Hoover. Chazz Palminteri is always a joy to watch. Jennifer Connelly is…Well Google Mulholland Falls under images, it comes up “Mulholland Falls Jennifer Connelly”… and you will see what I mean. Acting is good, but I feel it tries to be the 1950’s then it being the 1950’s. L.A. Confidential in my opinion is the 1950’s then as opposed to trying to feel like it. L.A also utilizing their characters the right way. Mulholland had Michael Madsen, Chris Penn, Daniel Baldwin for no reason. They needed to be used the right way, not have the viewer ask during the film, “Where are those guys?”…Then at the end, boom! They pop up. If you first state in the beginning of a film these guys as a team are badass and can solve problems, then utilizes them. Let them solve this problem as a team. Perfect example of throwing too many people into a film without utilizing what you promise to the viewer.
L.A. works better in this field.
“She was spectacular, wasn’t she?”

The big question between these two films are, if you had to pick? 
L.A. Confidential or Mulholland Falls

Well the two are smilier in many ways. Mulholland Falls came first, L.A. a year later. You will notice there are many times that certain films that come out close together, are the same, story and look wise. The reason this happens a lot in the movie business is during the script selling stage. When you try and sell a script to a studio you sign a piece of paper stating, you will not sue them if they come out with a film like the one you are trying to sell. If the studio passes on the script, they can still make “their own version”. You will notice this happening a lot i.e. (2012’s) Snow White and the Huntsman/Mirror Mirror or (2006’s) The Prestige/The Illusionist.

So maybe L.A. Confidential and Mulholland Falls took part in this stage of Hollywood, not sure maybe they didn’t, thou I find it hard to believe…I pick L.A. Confidential.

Why?

Better Story.

Better Acting.

and it looks and feel’s that of the 1950’s.


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