Millenial Horror

October 27, 2016

Millennial Horror – 2002 Halloween: Resurrection

Halloween: Resurrection – Sad

SAD

Suffice to say, the “Halloween” franchise has had it’s ups-and-downs. While the 1978 classic is universally revered and beloved for it’s villain and perfection of the “slasher” genre in horror, from “Halloween 2” onward, the luster faded quickly. Personally, I love the “Halloween” franchise despite the degeneration in quality over the years, but nothing could have prepared me for what I would see in the “final” installment of the canon story-line (I’m not counting the Rob Zombie versions). “Halloween: Resurrection” is that special kind of film that will surely leave you wondering, “what in the actual f*ck….”

The easy way to review this film is that while some people might think it’s funny, it’s incredibly cringe-worthy, and the final EPIC fight between Michael Myers and Busta Rhymes (yes, Busta Rhymes) is just sad, sad, and sad. In it’s own way, its now a punching bag for how bad acting and horror had become in 2002.

The only interesting thing about this film is the fate of Jamie Lee Curtis’ Laurie Strode, which is ballsy, but not all that surprising as the series had grown so stale that something drastic had to be done, is the lead thoroughly buried enough for you?

That’s all that can really be said about “Halloween: Resurrection.” It’s just that bad that actually thinking about it just make me want to stop thinking about it….I mean this film was so bad where it was at this point where the decision was made to go through with an entire remake/reboot/re-hash, whatever you want to call it.

The cast is a laughable group of stereotypes that we’ve all seen in numerous other “teen-centric” fare, but Tyra Banks and Busta Rhymes, the zeitgeist at the time, like I’ve said before, put a rapper and/or a model in a horror film, boom, Marketing 101. The film will suck, but at least that first week at the box office will be gangbusters.

You might think, “Wow, Matt loves horror…why is he ripping this movie apart?” Well, just let the clip(s) below marinate and I’ll get back to you on the next review….

October 8, 2016

Millennial Horror – 2001: Thir13en Ghosts

THERE

Thir13en Ghosts –There

Getting into the 2016 Halloween spirit, we are going to pick up right where we left off in 2015. In case you missed it, “Scream 3” was our last attempt and to keep the good times rolling let’s revisit another lackluster horror attempt from the early 2000s, namely 2001, with “Thir13en Ghosts” a remake of William Castle’s 1960 classic “13 Ghosts.”

To be honest, this isn’t a bad film. It’s got some great set pieces, I love the ghost designs, and the stories behind them, but just like most Dark Castle-produced, there always seems to be something missing. Maybe it’s the lack of scares, the over, or poor, acting, or maybe even the inclusion of dated pop culture zeitgeist, ie, Marilyn Manson’s “Sweet Dreams’ in “The House on Haunted Hill” and using rappers as actors (stay tuned for a review from a film for 2002 coming soon). I guess at the end of the day, you have to take the good with the bad.

The gist of “Ghosts” is that there is this guy trying to collect ghosts in order to powerful machine that would essentially make him a god. He is only missing the Thirteenth Ghost in order to finally bring the machine to full power. A pretty straight forward plot that is at times style-over-substance, but just like many Dark Castle-produced fare, the films are dumb and fun.

The ghosts in the film are interesting, each with their own little mythology and the makeup effects are really quite impressive. With so much emphasis on digital effects in modern horror, it’s great to see actual, live people in costumes, it really is a lost art.

The acting is pretty hokey and just plain bad, but again, you take the good with the bad and it doesn’t take you out of the film too badly, but yeah, when it’s bad, it’s bad.

Overall, “Ghosts” is a fun little remake with some nice production design, but plenty of flaws, but that doesn’t mean it’s unwatchable, besides maybe Rah Digga’s acting, you won’t be spitting bars, you might just spit up.

Welcome to the new home of SimplisticReviews.net - We're currently still working on the site. You might notice a few issues, please be patient with us. Thanks! (Store also in testing — no orders shall be fulfilled.)
Scroll to top