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Simply Horrifying

November 1, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 13

Happy post-Halloween you creeps!  In this 13th episode of Simply Horrifying we have an episode that probably is the most memorable in my opinion.  Being a child of the late 1980s and early 1990s one of my favorite movies has “The Goonies” and this episode, entitled “Undertaking Parlor” has the finger prints of “The Goonies” all over it.

A group of friends stumble upon a town conspiracy to kill it’s riches residents and profit off of their funerals.  Starring John Glover as the town mortician and Data from “The Goonies” as Josh, the aspiring film director of the group, can three four friends put a stop to this evil plot or murder for profit.

Click the link above for the full review and don’t forget to subscribe, comment, or leave us hate mail, if you dare……

October 31, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 12

There were days when vampires were vampires and not whiny little bitches who sparkle in front of mouth-breathers.  Vampires were bad-ass creatures of the night that seduced women and drained them of their blood while making them their vampire mates.  Those were the days, or nights, if you will.
On this episode of Simply Horrifying we take on a little tale entitled “The Reluctant Vampire.”  A really strong episode from season three that finds Malcom McDowell as the titular vampire who works the night shift at the blood bank.  Fearing for his job when a blood shortage hits, he succumbs to his primal nature to save the bank.
Click the link above for the full review, if you dare……..
October 29, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 11

What’s scarier than a watching a stage version of “Hamlet?”  How about Jon Lovitz as the lead.  Of course I’m not putting Jon Lovitz down, even if Andy Dick did wish death upon him, I still think he’s great.

“Top Billing” is another fine episode from the already great third season of “Tales from the Crypt.”  The aforementioned Lovitz plays a down on his luck actor looking for his big break.  Seeing an ad for a stage production of “Hamlet” he thinks he’s finally found it, or has he?

Click the link above for the latest edition of Simply Horrifying, if you dare…….

October 28, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 10

After a bit of dead silence, Simply Horrifying is back!  In this ghoulish offering we witness what some people will do for money.  Pretend to kill themselves mostly, but if you think there won’t be any repercussions, you have to be out of your mind.

“The Trap” directed by Michael J. Fox, is an entry from the “Shock Suspenstories” line of comics where “Double Indemnity” is given a run for it’s money.  Starring Bruce McGill and Teri Garr, as a couple just dying to make it rich, “The Trap” is one of the stronger early episodes from Season Three of “Tales from the Crypt.”

Click the link above for the full review, if you dare……

October 21, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 09

Welcoming you back to the Crypt, this is Matt with another edition of Simply Horrifying.  As we creep into Season Three of “Tales from the Crypt” we start off with a real bang, and a snap, and a pluck of your eyeballs with the help of a circling vulture.
“Carrion Death” is not only a clever name, but it’s also a damn good episode starring  Kyle MacLachlan as a murderer who not only just escaped death row, but just robbed a bank too.  What a go-getter.  With a cop in hot pursuit, Mexico in sight, and a pesky vulture looking to grab the leftovers, what will become of this unlikely trio?
For the full review, click the link above, if you dare…….
October 18, 2013

Simplistic Reviews Presents: Simply Horrifying featuring Tales from the Crypt Ep. 08

Welcome back to Simply Horrifying as we reach an end to Season Two of “Tales from the Crypt” with a twisted tale of secrets identities entitled, cleverly enough, “The Secret.”  It’s a nice wrap-up to the season that was arguably the strongest season out of the entire series.  Also of note was that this was the second episode in the series featuring Larry Drake, who you might remember as the psycho Santa in the Season One episode, “And All Through the House.”

Click the link above for the full review, if you dare…….

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