Superman

July 4, 2016

Ep. 71: Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice – Ultimate Edition – Movie Commentary: July 2016

Batman V Superman

 2016 | Superhero | 181 minutes

Today on this 4th of July we fight a 3hr war, one we thought we would lose. But we made it through all 3hrs of Zack Snyder’s poor choices to bring you another Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary. We’re sure you have better things to do today. Drink and Eating come to mind. But the time may come when you must watch that

Batman V Superman

Dawn of Justice

Ultimate Edition

Extended Cut

Collectors Edition

Movie Commentary

Christ that’s a mouthful. Then lets watch it together. A army of one. A uprising to be independent from unbelievable plot holes in a $250 million dollar movie. I mean it’s crazy to think these people are professionals and still somehow find work.

So remember young ones. You don’t need to jam 10 pounds of shit into a 5 pound bag. Fill up that first bag with all that needed shit and grab another 5 pound bag to finish stuffing that shit. Because having two bags of shit is okay, not one overstuffed bag of shit with plot holes throughout its 3hr run time is okay. Shit boys and girl, that just doesn’t fly!
 
March 25, 2016

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

Spoiler Free Review
Batman V Superman
Dawn of Justice:
Bloated 
 2h 33mins | Action | 2016

So how is Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice?

It’s Good. Not great…but good.



That’s it in a nutshell. The movie is fun, dark and gritty. Everyone’s sure to be favorite is Batman. Big reason I went to see it plus well… Wonder Woman. Been dying to see Wonder Woman in a movie. But Batman…he is simply amazing.

The film as a whole is riddled with problems. The truth is the movie itself is its own worse enemy.

Let’s start with the good.

Ben Affleck kills it as both Bruce Wayne and Batman. First actor that filled both those shoes since Keaton. Keaton as Bruce Wayne really? Yes he was the closest. When Batman Begins hit I thought Bale did the deuces, but as his mantel of Batman continued his voice became worse. Keaton in two films held the two better then anyone else since. Well until Affleck stole it from under his cape. Affleck steals the film. Just takes the film and runs with it. The voice is awesome. The cave is great and the Batmobile, ugh I want more. Alfred was great as well. He has a few moments that will make you grin. I simply cannot rest till I see a standalone film with those two again, I just cannot. I hope Affleck does a few Batman movies and continues this with what he has created. Oh when they do, please use one villain, stop the cramming of a few into one movie.  

Lex Luther, a lot of people will hate this version but I liked it. It’s different but simple. Lex is just crazy. He is ruthless, smart and pretty much a mad scientist. Dare I say at the end I liked it? True is half way into the film I hated Eisenberg’s performance. But as the mad scientist it grew on me and at the end I was intrigued to see where it will go in the future.

Visually the movie looks great. Its dark and I liked it. All the suits look amazing. Superman, Wonder
Woman and Batman look great. The costumes are just on point. I cannot talk more on how amazing they are.

Wonder Woman was kickass. I liked her a lot and I only wish there was more. I got excited when they call out Diana Prince’s name. Her as WW that costume looks great and when she popped up she received such a large cheer at the theater. Gal Gadot is Wonder Woman and I will be there on opening day when her film drops.

Listen Batman and Wonder Woman are the the best part of this bloated film. Everything else kinda makes you wonder why. But damn it was entertaining to watch this on the big screen.

What about the Bad stuff?

The film is 10 years too late. If this came out before The Avengers I think things would work out better. Like I said the movie is its own worst enemy. The idea of this film being the beginning of this larger world and following up with having a Justice League film is the biggest issue I have here. Because this isn’t one movie.

“This is 4 movies crammed into a 2hr and 33 min film. That just didn’t need to be”

Superman was under used and weak. This could of been better on the writers end. Then again I don’t care much for Superman anyway, but come on guys. There is so much to do with him yet they seemed to not want to do the leg work.

Should Superman exist is a great idea for a movie, maybe a Superman standalone one but we didn’t need to be here yet with this film. Why? Because they first should of created a single Batman movie. The two could create a build up to a real Batman V Superman. Here there isn’t much of a buildup. Mostly you see and feel it from Bruce but I wish we had a scene were you see him at the funeral for everyone at Wayne Enterprises or something really painful. Yes you do get hints but it doesn’t feel enough for me. That beginning was great but we needed more. You understand he takes this personal and he wants this not to happen again but it should of been more of a build up. You should see that anger build which we get but there should of been more. The movie just had no more room for it. Yet its a 2 and a half film. That shouldn’t be. The movie just had no idea where to go with itself.

It should of only been Batman and Superman. Each gets to bring 1 person. That is. But when you add the Dawn of Justice, things begin to go a different way. This doesn’t become a film about Batman vs Superman, it becomes a film about coming together which isn’t what we as the viewer were sold on.

I only wanted to see each other kick each others asses. We get that but its small. Next film should of been the building of the team. I didn’t want to hear about all these other characters now, I didn’t want to hear about anything but two guys who hate each other. But that is the issue.

Too much in one film.

What you end up getting is this back and forth.

Batman is great but then you switch to Diana Prince and your like shit I want to see her in her own film. Then it’s back to Clark, then Batman damn Batman is cool I can’t wait to see-then boom! Cut to Superman then back to Woman Woman then to Bruce then to Lex.

“Ugh I just want to see Batman that is all and damn I can’t wait to see a Wonder Woman movie”. This was my thought process, over and over again. We should of gotten that before hand.

This film is bloated. It has way too many comic book stories jammed in. Way too many characters.

Just way too much in a already too long of a film.

Oh and yeah Doomsday. You saw the trailer. Well there is more but its pretty much the same Doomsday. He changes a bit and gives Superman a run for his money. This whole part felt like it could of been better. Saw a lot of great opportunities but it didn’t go as far as it could.

There is this one great shot of Superman in space that looks great, but that’s all I can say without giving anything away.

Other then that it was fun to watch but

March 22, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast (Ep. 66) March 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY



On this ORDER 66 Episode of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys get prepped for Batman V Superman with a brand new skit.  Matt accepts our award from GeekCast Radio Network for best podcast. And to prove that they can be fair, the boys play a round of Simply Say Anything.  Trailers, Indiana Jones, and Daredevil talk.  All this and more on the March edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.


Notes

Order 66
Sean Connery Slapping Women Explanation
Judge Reinhold
Predator Poster
James Franco Batman Cowl

Music

In Your Eyes By Peter Gabriel

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August 31, 2013

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: August Edition

Hello boils and ghouls.  Okay, this isn’t the Cryptkeeper, and it’s nearly three months away from Halloween, but I couldn’t help myself.  But what I can offer you is The Simplistic Reviews Podcast for the month of August (and some of June and July, we had a lot to catch up on in this edition).

After an extended hiatus the boys are back (of course this is Matt speaking in the 3rd person) and maybe not better then ever, but at least their adequate.  This month they jump into the “Ben Affleck as Batman” debate head first, share their shame in everyone’s favorite segment, “Simply Ashamed,” talk some “Breaking Bad,” celebrate the filmography of Sinbad, and campaign for the best film coming this Fall.

Be sure to check the show notes below for more fun and hijinks.

Show Notes:

What Makes Breaking Bad so good?
SlaughterFilm
Cinema and Suds
Fall Movie Preview

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Click HERE to listen to podcast

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July 12, 2013

Man of Steel

Man of Steel – Sponsors

SPONSORS

The time is now for Warner Bros. and DC Comics.  The window has already closed to be able to compete with Disney and Marvel Comics so its time to just try and carve out a little bit of a niche for themselves.  Sure, Christopher Nolan’s Batman Trilogy was a huge success, but that’s over, and unless you thought “Green Lantern” was a good direction for DC Comics film-wise, well, I’d have to disagree with you on that one.  So with all their chips on the table, Warner/DC has decided to go for the Hail Mary.  That Hail Mary is “Man of Steel,” sponsored by Sears, 7-11, IHOP, and of course, LexCorp.

Contrary to what you might hear about “Man” the film isn’t that bad, sure its loud, bombastic, brash, and suffers from a severe case of style-over-substance…..hmmm, well, I guess “Man of Steel” isn’t that great when I really stop and think about it.  While it has some good ideas, the way Superman is presented almost makes this attempt feel like this is a sequel to another film.  And while “Man” tries it’s best to distance itself from the less-than-super “Superman Returns” there are too many scenes where director, Zack Snyder, once again, lets his ego get in the way and decides to make things explode as opposed to detailing the psychology of Clark Kent and how he’s torn between being the last son of a dying world and the protector to a new one. Snyder shoehorns scenes of Clark’s more impressionable years in Smallville, but the scenes merely feel like a feeble attempt at trying to make us feel like he has a soul and why he feels an obligation to the human race.  I almost feel “Man of Steel” would have been better suited as a trilogy as opposed to fitting everything into one giant action-fest.  Obviously Warners has no interest in another compelling “Dark Knight-like” trilogy, they are so busy trying to catch up to Marvel.  The one thing I will say is that Superman isn’t as interesting to be able to fit into an entire trilogy like Bruce Wayne/Batman.

At the end of “Man” I was left both wanting more and wanting less, if that is possible.  The action scenes were both large in scope, but felt empty; the story of Kal-El/Clark Kent/Superman was both easy to follow, yet lacked depth; and the story became inconsequential come the start of the 3rd act when everything that can go boom, goes boom.  I’m sure Michael Bay had plenty of tissue handy when he witnessed Metropolis being torn apart by a group of Kryptonians.

What troubles me the most about this new direction for Warner/DC is the world building, or lack thereof. Sure, you get a nod to LexCorp, Wayne Enterprises and other minor DC characters that may exist in this specific universe, but while Warner says they want to complete with Marvel in the superhero-movie-making business, they still seem to want to make self-contained films and somehow make them all gel.  If you go all the way back to when Marvel released “Iron Man” the plan was already in motion for more films within a coherent universe.  Marvel could have slapped “Iron Man” together and flown by the seat of their pants, but they made a conscience effort to create a world where other heroes could exist.  “Man of Steel” provides us with glimpses, or “Easter Eggs” of companies which have meaning to characters such as Lex Luthor, Batman, and Cyborg, but you’re left to wonder how many movies it is going to take to finally set in motion a “Justice League” or even a “World’s Finest” film.  At this stage in the game it looks like we’ll get another “Man of Steel” film in 2015 and maybe a “Batman” reboot in 2016.  You might say “Well, you can’t create an entire universe in just one film.”  I’d say back “How come Marvel was able to do it, and make us believe they knew what they were doing from the get-go?”

In no way am I shredding this film, even though it might sound like it.  There are things I genuinely like about “Man of Steel.”  I thought the acting and casting was spot on, and it looks like we finally have an actor playing Superman that we can believe in with Henry Cavill.  He fits the suit like a glove and his banter with Lois Lane, played wonderfully by Amy Adams, is vintage.  Michael Shannon continues to impress as General Zod and is quickly becoming one of my favorite characters actors in Hollywood.  The supporting cast is solid as well, including Russell Crowe as Jor-El and Lawrence Fishburne as Perry White, Chief Editor of The Daily Planet.

With “Man of Steel,” Warner/DC neither loses ground or gains ground on the Disney/Marvel juggernaut.  If anything it washes the taste out of Superman fans mouths for “Superman Returns” and gives people plenty of explosions.  What it didn’t do is break new ground.  Sure, Superman does some super things, but he also feels like a shell of what Superman should be; a protector of the Earth and Metropolis, not it’s destroyer as seen in the final 30 minutes of “Steel.”  This review sponsored by Wayne Enterprises.

Fun Fact:  General Zod’s first appearance was in Adventure Comics #283 in 1961.

June 24, 2013

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: A Little More Conversation

If you’ve been following our podcast since it’s inception, you know we like to rant, rave, and go on intense tangents.  Well this month we decided to take an entire unaired section of our May Podcast and turn it into a bonus edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

In this little nugget of joy we take on Iron Man 3, Star Trek Into Darkness and you get to hear Matt sink lower and lower into drunkenness.  It’s really a thing of beauty……and sadness.  On top of that we also delve into Peter Weller’s filmography and imagine if Robocop decided to police Hogwarts.

Show Notes:

Iron Man 3
Star Trek Into Darkness
Effects of Alcohol on Speech
Peter Weller

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Click HERE to listen to podcast

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May 6, 2013

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: April Edition

It’s that time of the month again, take that as you may, but you won’t need any tampons to listen to April’s Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

In this month’s edition we ponder who is more evil, Red Skull or Adolf Hitler, Sheri Moon Zombie’s ass, and Justin tries to sell Matt on Mad Men, and the P-word gets thrown into the mix.

The guys also test their movie quote knowledge in the new segment, “Simply Quotable,” and do a little Summer movie preview of their own with Iron Man already making waves.

If you like good wholesome family fun, well, find another podcast.  If you like three guys talking out of their ass for over an hour, well, now you’re on the right track with The Simplistic Reviews podcast.

Also, May 6th is National Nightmare Day, a Day to celebrate the 1984 horror classic “A Nightmare on Elm Street.”  Check over at SlaughterFilm.com for more information.

Show Notes:

Hannibal Review
Summer Movie Preview
The Benefit of Mad Men
National Nightmare Day

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY.

Click HERE to listen to podcast

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October 8, 2012

31 Nights of Halloween, Trick r Treat

Trick r Treat – Tradition

I know, I’m an anthology whore.  It started when I first got the box set for “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark.”  Reading those stories had a profound affect on me and how I saw and understood horror in general.  I still go back to those books every once in a while and re-live the good old days.  What can I say, I love short horror stories, and it works perfectly for the horror genre.  You really don’t see drama or action anthologies, it just fits with horror.   From “Creepshow” to the under appreciated “John Carpenter’s Body Bags” it had been a while since a reputable horror anthology had come out, until “Trick r Treat” was finally released, on DVD in 2009.

I say finally because the film was a wrap in 2007 and it showed up at a few film festivals, however, Warner Bros. had no idea what to do with the movie for two years, kind of like MGM with “The Cabin in the Woods.”  The travesty is that “Trick r Treat”never made it to the theaters, where I think it would have made a killing with audiences. But it did finally see the light of day in 2009 when it was released on DVD, and the cult following started from there. The movie has some credentials; it was directed by Michael Dougherty, who wrote the excellent “X2” and the sub-par “Superman Returns,” was produced by Bryan Singer, and we all know what he’s known for, and stars the likes of Brian Cox, pre-Sookie Anna Paquin, and the underrated Dylan Baker.

“Trick r Trick” is more so the “Pulp Fiction” of horror movies since the stories are interwoven as opposed to the separate stories with a wrap around formula, giving the film some teeth, and making it more thoughtful than your average horror fare.  The basic idea of “Trick r Treat” revolves around Halloween tradition and mythology while introducing the audience to a brand new Halloween mascot “Sam.”  He is the one constant in all the segments and, in my book, the most recognizable horror icon since Freddy Krueger (sorry “Saw” fans, Jigsaw doesn’t really rank up there for me).

The acting is solid, it has great atmosphere and, for my money, should become a Halloween movie tradition right up there with “Halloween” and “Creepshow.”  “Trick r Treat” is tons of fun, without all the filler, and with the right distributor (I’m looking at you Lionsgate) could turn into a yearly (clever) Halloween franchise.

Fun Fact:  “Trick r Treat” is based on a cartoon short created by Dougherty called “Season’s Greetings” from 1996. 

July 20, 2012

Zack and Miri Make a Porno

Zack and Miri Make a PornoLong

I consider Kevin Smith somewhat of a personal hero of mine.  Not only is he not afraid to take chances (Red State) but this guy dropped everything he had into his first movie and he was successful and got the chance to keep making movies.  Yes, he’s hit a few roadblocks along the way (being too fat to fly, “imploding” at Sundance 2011, “Cop Out“) but the guy makes movies for his fans, and not to mention himself which I respect.

When “Zack and Miri Make a Porno” came out there was some fan fare, and it did decent in the theaters, but for me the standout was one scene with one character and one actor with the surname “Long.”  In genius cameos, Brandon Routh aka the Superman that everyone hates aka Dylan Dog aka Todd Ingram, plays Bobby Long, the high school heart throb that Miri (Elizabeth Banks) has always been secretly in love with.  Meanwhile Zack (Seth Rogan) has recently made the acquaintance of one Brandon St. Randy (Justin Long) a film star most famous for the coming-of-age tale “You Better Shut Your Mouth Or I’m Gonna Fuck It.

In five short minutes Justin Long and Brandon Routh received pardons from me for both “Live Free or Die Hard” and “Superman Returns,” respectively.

Fun fact: Kevin Smith wrote one of the original scripts for a Superman re-boot that involved a giant spider (later taken by Wild, Wild West). “Zack and Miri” stars an actor who played Superman, while Kevin Smith co-starred with Justin Long in “Live Free or Die Hard“.

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