There is always a question of who is the BADDEST…
Lance Riddick is the BADDEST concierge.
Halle Berry and Angelica Houston are the BADDEST chicks.
Ian McShane is the BADDEST Hotel Manager.
Mark Dacascos has the BADDEST crew of Indonesian BADASSES this side of Southeast Asia.
oh…
Keanu Reeves is the BADDEST man in “John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum.”
Censorship is nothing new. In fact it’s a long held American TRADITION to censor things that we are afraid of or we think are doing to destroy the youth.
“We have to protect the youth!” said the old, out of touch white, and black, folk.
But there is also the TRADITION of fighting against the onslaught of people telling other people what to do.
Let’s not forget about the TRADITION of tell stories that have been passed on from culture to culture to generations upon generations. “Scary Stories” is the documentary that will hit the nerve of nostalgia while also showing how the culture of censorship continues to plague us as a society.
Well someone had to take these big city punks down a peg or two!
The MERIT badge for making a National Park Ranger the big bad in this 80s inspired “killer in the woods” romp goes to Jenn Wexler.
“The Ranger” is a tidy 80 minutes long and gets to the point without going over a pain-staking backstory for our heroine and how she fell into a gang of drug-dealing punk rockers.
Good gore, good villain, with a rocking soundtrack and score.
Over a decade of storytelling, 22 films, BILLIONS of dollars invested, and this is what we get?!
Let me just give a BOW of respect for what Paramount, Marvel, Disney, Sony, Fox, and anyone else who was involved in the creation of the MCU and the on again, off again relationship all the studios have had in order to generate this juggernaut which has led to “Avengers: Endgame.”
I swelled up and cried a lot in this film, because at the end of the day, strip away the bombastic characters, large scale battles, and all the special effects, because this “Endgame” is a character driven story with superheroes you’ve spent the better part of your life around.
There is something to be said about what The Russo Brothers have done here. They created a large scale film with pathos to spare and also enough moments that had your bursting at the seems with excitement. This decade-long journey to the inevitable culmination is huge, it’s exciting, and it’s something that we all just need to take in and enjoy because it’s special.
There’s nothing wrong with VANITY projects. Big music stars have done it for decades. “Purple Rain” with Prince, “Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker,” “Cool as Ice” with Vanilla Ice and who could forget “Swept Away” with the indomitable Madonna. Hmmm, come to think of it…maybe there is something wrong with them.
“Guava Island” is a 55-minute music video for Donald Glover where he gets to weave in some of his newer songs into a film about putting on a festival on a island that is under the control of a guy named Red Cargo who doesn’t want his works to have Sunday off.
Oh, Rihanna is also in this film.
It’s fine, and the opening animation scene reminded of something out of “Coco” and of course the public infatuation will continue for Glover, for good reason of course, the dude is super talented.
Let it be known that 2019’s “Pet Sematary” remake is a REMINDER that yes, sometimes dead is better…
No matter what I say people are going to continue to translate Stephen King’s work into films, but man, has there been any one source that has the up-and-down’s like King’s material.
After the remake of “It” hit big back in 2017, it was open season on getting back on King’s D and trying another remake; that one happened to be this year’s “Sematary.”
Sure, there are a couple of things that I like about this remake, but the acting is wooden and it almost feels like the filmmakers are trying to have their cake and eat it too. Is this flick high brown or low brow horror? How much can we change to make this story feel fresh, etc…
Sure, I don’t expect a new generation to check out the original from 1989, considering no one wants to watch an old movie, let’s just dive into a remake, but hopefully this is a lesson that not every film deserves that much coveted remake treatment.
This April Fool’s review is brought to you by Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn. I’m sure a bunch of you thought it was a joke when they starting showing up to award shows together, but “Dragged Across Concrete” is no joke, it’s an actual film, and it’s actually an UPWARD movement in the reestablishment of Gibson maybe making his way back into the Hollywood stream. Not mainstream, but at least dipping his toe back in the waters.
S. Craig Zahler’s filmography might be short, but damn is it impressive. From horror-western fare, prison exploitation and now heist films, he’s getting impressive results away from the mainstream and creating pretty kick-ass films.
Gibson and Vaughn are great, but the star of this film is Tory Kittles as the freshly releases ex-con looking to make good on taking care of his family by any means necessary and still having a moral code.
“Bone Tomahawk” and “Brawl in Cell Block 99” are great on their own, but I think “Concrete” is Zahler’s best work to date and he’s shaping up to be the Neo-Tarantino we all deserve.
So last time we tried something new, something mysterious, something crazy!
The people responded and wanted more or we’re just untalented hacks…anyway we did it again!
Matt and Justin watch a movie just in-time for another movie that’s due out April 5. Wow a movie commentary tie-in? Kinda…But unlike last time, both Matt and Justin have seen this film before.
Sure, it may be just a one off type of film but damn its really mysterious is it not?
So join Matt as he joins DJ in a movie commentary like none other…a mystery movie…eh movie commentary!?
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(Ep. 120): Guns – Movie Commentary: April 2019
Sure, the mystery movie commentaries were fun. But you knew what you wanted and we knew what you needed. So today we give it like it has never been given…That is why, for no other reason, April 26 was circled on our calendars.
A date we know a lot of you have been counting down towards.
A date that will most likely go down in movie history.
April 26, 2019.
The date Simplistic Reviews finally watched…Guns!
Shit yeah! Andy Sidaris! The Sidaris Cinematic Universe continues of the greatest movie series ever! Bombs! Bullets and Babes! This isn’t no children’s Endgame, this is real shit!