one word reviews of Movies and TV

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

A Simplistic Review: Suspiria (2018)


Remake, reboot, homage, inspired by, retake, re-do, call it what you will, there will always be criticism and comparisons especially when you have a film by the same name released that holds a place in group's collective heart. Here we have "Suspiria" the 2018 film "inspired" or a "homage" to the 1977 giallo classic from Dario Argento.

Luca Guadagnino creates a version of "Suspria" with so much DEPTH that its likely to alienate the old guard, but creates something new, different, and fresh that mirrors our current dark societal problems, embraces dread, and cuts through the glammed up Euro-horror of it's 1977 predecessor.

The reason so many remakes get slammed is for obvious reasons; its the idea that people are simply cashing in on a named property, ie, "Ghostbusters." But "Suspria" takes a title and while still using the same names and places, fleshes out a world that is scary, gloomy, and keeps you invested and on the edge even with it's bloated 152-minute runtime.

Word to the wise, try to divorce yourself from the Argento version and enjoy this as a film that takes cues from Miike, Von Trier, Cronenberg, Hitchock, and Aronofsky.

Monday, November 12, 2018

(Ep. 112): If Looks Could Kill - Movie Commentary: Novemeber 2018


If Looks Could Kill

1991 Action Comedy 1hr 28m

Before he can graduate, cocky high school student Michael Corben (Richard Grieco) travels to France on a school trip to earn a missing French credit. But when a British intelligence agent mistakes Michael for a spy of the same name, they rush him to headquarters and assign him to capture the evil Augustus Steranko (Roger Rees), using a plethora of espionage gadgetry. Michael has the time of his life -- until he crosses paths with two assassins (Tom Rack, Carole Davis) who want him dead.

Director: William Dear
Story by: Fred Dekker 

 Why? Because why not! Open that bottle of wine you keep thinking about and spend a lovely evening with DJ, Matt, Justin and the God that is Richard Grieco. Feast your eyes upon the Grieco and say goodbye to your family, because looks can kill!






Saturday, November 10, 2018

'Mid90s' and What the Hell Happened to Us?

Pontificating about "Mid90s" for about three weeks, considering we were a little busy on the site with Halloween reviews and all that other fun and spooky stuff, geez man, this flick is probably going to be my #1 film of 2018.

Jonah Hill brings to life a lot of things that I went through either from a FAMILY aspect, and things I might regret I did, as well as the culture of being a latch-key kid where you would leave for the day and come back when the sun went down. It was a simpler time that still had some innocence attached and the highest stakes you had to deal with is whether you were going to get beat up by the older junior high or high school kids.

20 years after I lived my "mid90s" life it makes me think, and gets me a little depressed, how dramatically the world has changed. The abundance of mass shootings, the rapid reemergence of White Nationalism, calls that everything you hear from the News and Reporters are lies and "Alternative Facts" are an accepted form of currency, and just the overall decorum of our civility with each other.

There was a time when you could leave the house on your bike or skateboard and not worry about making it home. Sure, danger exists, like Al Pacino said "...get killed walking your doggie." But I know we like to bemoan the idea of "the good old days," and I'm at a point in my life, especially after my experience with "Mid90s," where I ask "What the Hell Happened to Us?"     

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

31 Films of Halloween: Terror in the Aisles


If you want a quick EDUCATION on horror, suspense and sci-fi, you can look no farther than the original YouTube clip montage video, "Terror in the Aisles."

From "Nighthawks" to "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre," this pseudo-documentary with Nancy Allen and Donald Pleasance doing the talking is fun, scary and is the perfect little 82 minute clip show for the horror film novice.

Blood Feast

Blood Feast is fundamental in a handful of ways. Released in 1963 I can only imagine the effect this had on horror and comedy. For me this was the film that allowed me to enter the world of cheesy explicit gore and violence. To laugh and be in awe, it was then I found a calling.

Lifeforce

Lifeforce is a feast of a good time. Vampires from space, check! Space Girl completely naked for pretty much the entire film, check! Awesome FX, check! Sure, the film could use some trimming and has a few goofy moments but Lifeforce is very entertaining. Check it out! 

Monday, October 29, 2018

(Ep. 111): The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: October 2018

What could be more spooky then a Simplistic Reviews Spooktastic Podcast? Okay so you could just  turn on the news which is scary enough.

Today, we bring the Halloween to your ears on the 111th episode of... wait this episode is number 111? So I times 111 by 6... 666!!!, Oh my god Gregory Sestero its the mark of the beast! Damn that's perfect timing or we held off a movie commentary from being released to make a Halloween stupid joke. Nay...not us we aren't that cheesy.

So let's all indulge into some candy, laugh, drink and talk about news and some spooky thoughts we had recently as well make fun of those shitty Hollywood scumbags on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.

 Boooo!










Wednesday, October 24, 2018

31 Films of Halloween: Mandy

Pro tip: DRUGS would help the experience of "Mandy." But even without DRUGS, this flick from the director of "Beyond the Black Rainbow" and son of the guy that directed the ever-excellent "Tombstone," Panos Cosmatos is all about Nicolas Cage and his descent into madness after a sex cult kills his fantasy-loving wife and destroys his peaceful existence.

The imagery is fascinating, the score one of the best from the late, Johann Johannsson, and if you love grindhouse and acid trip type cinema from the 70s and 80s, this very well might be the "Citizen Kane" of the genre.

The violence is brutal and gory, which I love, and if you like to see Nic Cage flip out "Kiss of the Vampire" style with a touch of "Face/Off" and a pinch of "The Wicker Man," oh boy are you in for a treat.

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

31 Films of Halloween: Apostle


I know that a lot of people are making the comparison to "The Wicker Man" for Netflix's "Apostle" but to me there is a lot more resemblance to RESIDENT Evil.

Evil cult, weird dude with a crazy mask and usually a large weapon, and a ton of gore, this is totally "Resident Evil 4."

Gareth Evans uses some great tension and set pieces to create a super creepy story that makes his short from "V/H/S/2" seem like child's play and the standout performances of Michael Sheen and Mark Lewis Jones, this is one of the better Netflix's original films in quite a while.

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