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Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Ep. 73: Friday the 13th Part III - Movie Commentary: August 2016

Friday the 13th Part III
1982 | Slasher | 1hr 35min

Welcome to the first ever 3D Podcast! How is a audio only podcast in 3D? We have no idea...

Requested by Bradley Taylor,
Friday the 13th Part III once again follows murderer Jason Voorhees, who as a child drowned off the waters of Camp Crystal Lake. Is there anyone that can put an end to Jason's murderous rampage? 

Friday the 13th Part III is a 1982 American 3D slasher film directed by Steve Miner and the third installment in the Friday the 13th film series. Originally released in 3-D, it is the first film to feature antagonist Jason Voorhees wearing his signature hockey mask, which has become a trademark of both the character and franchise, as well an icon in American cinema and horror films in general. As a direct sequel to Friday the 13th (1980) and Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981), the film follows a group of co-eds on vacation at a house on Crystal Lake, where Jason Voorhees has taken refuge. (IMDB)


Friday, August 5, 2016

CUTTING ROOM FLOOR - From Podcast Ep.72

A clip cut from Podcast Ep. 72 ends up on the CUTTING ROOM FLOOR!

Topic "Marc Summers"

On this August edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys come back from their vacation and catch up with what they missed.  JD Duran from Insession Film joins them for a game of Word Association and a brand new game called Simplistic Submarine.  The entire Insession family also helps the boys with their ode to Jason Bourne.  Yo-Ho-Ho mateys! All that and more on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.
 


Thursday, August 4, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast (Ep. 72) August 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY


On this August edition of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys come back from their vacation and catch up with what they missed.  JD Duran from Insession Film joins them for a game of Word Association and a brand new game called Simplistic Submarine.  The entire Insession family also helps the boys with their ode to Jason Bourne.  Yo-Ho-Ho mateys! All that and more on this episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.



NOTES
Dr. Strange Trailer
Wonder Woman Trailer
Justice League Trailer
Blair Witch Trailer
Kong Skull Island Trailer
Rocketeers
Fantastic Beasts Trailer
Hacksaw Ridge Trailer

MUSIC
Let It Happen By Tame Impala
1976 By RJD2
I Dream Of genie Remix 
Chronos By Hi-Finesse

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Tuesday, August 2, 2016

3 Simplistic Things: July 2016

And we're back....and it's not A Dinosaur Story....The month of July brought us so many wonderful things, and by wonderful I mean a bunch of things that people bitched about on the Internet. So here....we....Go.

Pokemon...DOH!
Here's the key to 2016. As long as you make every polling station in America a Poke-Stop....motherfu*kers might go out and vote!

Ghost Bust This!
Well, the movie that sent feminists and meninists wild was finally released, and after just about a week, no one was talking about it again...go figure...thanks Internet...we'll move onto our next controversy.

Batgirl Gets Down?!
In one of the most unnecessary revisions in DC Comics Animated history...Batgirl has sex with Batman in the animated version of "The Killing Joke." Look, we know Batgirl is a bad-ass, but in a comic where she is victimized, we also need to see her subjugate herself to having to f*ck Batman on a rooftop? Sorry, spoilers, I'm sure those pages were stuck together in Alan Moore's original draft of his book back in 1989.

That's enough ranting...kthnxbye...

Monday, August 1, 2016

Remember

Remember: Solid


1hr 34mins | Drama/Thriller | 2015

In a New York nursing home, the elderly Auschwitz concentration camp survivor Max Rosenbaum has befriended the dementia patient Zev Guttman, whom he recognized from their days at the camp. Max has continually reminded Zev that their families were murdered at the camp by the Blockführer Otto Wallisch, who immigrated to North America under the false name Rudy Kurlander. Max convinces Zev to avenge their families by seeking out and killing Wallisch. IMDB

Christoper Plummer brings his best in a performance that hits your emotions hard. This movie is all about Plummer's performance, the story is good but his performance is what stands out. 


Zev doesn't know where Otto is, so he must travel to locate the real Otto by finding every Rudy Kurlander he can. Each Rudy (there are 4 Rudy Kurlander) we're introduced to is more interesting then the last. A real crazy moment is when Dean Norris comes in playing one of the Rudy's son. Norris is perfect in his role and the interaction between him and Zev is a one of a few great highlights of this movie. Another is during Zev's travels his dementia keeps taking over and his fight to remember why he's traveling leads to a interesting highlight. In order to do this he reads a letter from Max that gives him a quick refresh of why he is traveling and what happened to his wife. Moments like writing "read the letter" on his wrist gives you a good idea of how bad it is.
 
The movie is good. I was surprised honestly because after a few minutes from when I started it I felt the movie was going way too slow. When the dementia began I thought it was only there to take up time where the writer didn't want to write. Camera movement, staging and lighting added a cheap direct to dvd feel that disappeared quickly as the movie progressed. Everything up to the ending was pretty good. Once the ending came though I must admit how surprised I was. The ending was perfect and it adds one great twist I did not seen coming. Remember is a solid entertaining movie that I was extremely delight to have found. 

Also I would like to note the great Jürgen Prochnow appears. He's pretty awesome.







Saturday, July 23, 2016

Trailer Hot Take: Luke Cage/Iron Fist

This weekend is San Diego Comic Con, and around this time the floodgates usually open for all sorts of first looks, trailers, news, notes, and general nerd-dom. For fans of Netflix and their Marvel offers, this was a big week with both a trailer for Luke Cage, and a teaser for Iron Fist. Let's dive in and take a look.

First look at Frankie Faison playing Pop
Ready....
Kick in the door, waving the car door....
THEE SHOT of the trailer
These are so many things to look into this shot, done with great purpose. It's masterful
Remy "Cottonmouth" Danton
Look at that beauty. With an ODB track on the trailer, and A Tribe Called Quest working the soundtrack....what more could you want from this....

and now....

We don't know much yet about the adventures of Danny Rand and his kung-fu antics, but here are a few stills from the teaser.

Young Danny with his mom as the plane goes down
Monks....so you know where this is going
Mr. Danny Rand

With these two trailers it finally fills out the roster of The Defenders, which is supposed to premier sometime in 2017. Fun times ahead for all!

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

3 Simplistic Things: June 2016

We are half-way through the year already, can you believe it?! The dog days of Summer are here, so the news is a little thin, but let's look at a few things.

Winter is Here
This season was both a culling of the field for a lot of characters on the show, and an olive branch to some fans...cough....DJ...cough...who were growing tired of seeing bad things happen to good characters. This was also the first season not truly behold to books that may or may not even come out in the next decade.

People Will Watch Anything by Pixar
Finding Dory is proof positive that Pixar has their priorities backwards, and perhaps Ellen Degeneres has photos of John Lasseter doing....things....who knows...Anyway, perhaps this film is good, perhaps it's not, but I don't really care, but I guess nearly a billion people are right. Right?

RIP Anton
Live long and prosper.....

Til next month......kthnxbye

Monday, July 4, 2016

Independence Day: Resurgence

Independence Day: Resurgence - Trash

 

Never has a movie pissed me off more. I mean wtf is going on here? Every element from 96's ID4 is horrifically whored out like the little slut it apparently is. Listen I get ID4 is not perfect as some people make it out to be, but it was a good summer film that I thought was honestly pure fun. A sequel was never needed. But if it was to become a reality this is far from it. Resurgence is a mess it simply is a thrown together money grabber like Sony is doing with Ghostbusters. There is no reason for any of these films to be made but for greed little shits to make money. This new ID4.2 world is a overblown CG shit feast of a futuristic 2016 that does nothing but make me cringe the entire time.

This whole this is just sad. Everything about this is disgustingly sad.


Dylan Hiller (Hiller's son) who is played as a complete douche by is back but in the place of his father. Will Smith didn't want to come back and I fully understand why. The thing about him being thrown into his fathers role is that even though Dylan hasn't done anything worthy, for some reason he gets to ride his fathers coattails and is placed on the same pedestal. What the hell has he done himself?! Oh and the fact that Will Smith dies during a Test-flight makes the hero Hiller more like a zero. It would of been better if he ate a bullet because he couldn't take the fame and nightmares anymore. Or maybe because he saw this train wreck. Dylan Hiller is one annoying ass character.

Thor's brother can't lead a movie to save is life. He has no charisma. His acting is fine but the dude just can not hold a film on his own. His dialogue also makes him another annoying character in a already bloat annoying character film. Why this character is even here is a mystery to all. Thou he does make a lot of stupid faces which made the film a bit more enjoyable...a bit more.

Goldblum is back! He's playing the same character as before, just for some reason seems to be a lot smarter now. I mean he was a smart dude before but in this movie he just guesses everything and it's always completely right. There is like 5 times where everyone is like, "What is this...". Goldblum just pops in with the right answer out of the blue. The writers did a poor job on this film. Goldblum being brought back was a way to make their job easier to explain and keep plot-holes from manifesting.

Bastards. Oh yeah

Goldblum's dad is back, he does nothing but put a whole school bus of kids in danger of being brutally killed. Yep that's it. Seriously watch the movie, he does nothing.

President Bill Pullman is back and...Makes another speech. You know it worked before, but this one is very forced, like rape. Plus his voice was all over the place I'm not sure what happened there and he takes a place of another character from the first ID4. (One that is already dead) Again he's thrown in because its a sequel! So lets throw Vivica Fox in as well. Who is not a stripper anymore, she a doctor! Good for her and her douche son.

The ending is pretty much the same as the first one, killing the aliens and hugging in a desert. I must say this was one of the laziest movies I've seen in years. Guess what? The ending is setup for a sequel. Yep and boy will you be amazed with this ending.

All and all this movie did nothing. Really it is the direct to VHS blockbuster shit version of 96's ID4. It was utter trash.

Ep. 71: Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice - Ultimate Edition - Movie Commentary: July 2016

Batman V Superman

 2016 | Superhero | 181 minutes

Today on this 4th of July we fight a 3hr war, one we thought we would lose. But we made it through all 3hrs of Zack Snyder's poor choices to bring you another Simplistic Reviews Movie Commentary. We're sure you have better things to do today. Drink and Eating come to mind. But the time may come when you must watch that

Batman V Superman

Dawn of Justice

Ultimate Edition

Extended Cut

Collectors Edition

Movie Commentary

Christ that's a mouthful. Then lets watch it together. A army of one. A uprising to be independent from unbelievable plot holes in a $250 million dollar movie. I mean it's crazy to think these people are professionals and still somehow find work.

So remember young ones. You don't need to jam 10 pounds of shit into a 5 pound bag. Fill up that first bag with all that needed shit and grab another 5 pound bag to finish stuffing that shit. Because having two bags of shit is okay, not one overstuffed bag of shit with plot holes throughout its 3hr run time is okay. Shit boys and girl, that just doesn't fly!






 

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